DN31.11. Fake Friends

Sigalovada Sutta("Advice to Sigālaka")

“Householder’s son, you should recognize these four enemies disguised as friends: the taker, the talker, the flatterer, the spender.

You can recognize a fake friend who’s all take on four grounds.

Your possessions end up theirs.
Giving little, they expect a lot.
They do their duty out of fear.
They associate for their own advantage.

You can recognize a fake friend who’s all take on these four grounds.

You can recognize a fake friend who’s all talk on four grounds. They’re hospitable in the past. They’re hospitable in the future. They’re full of meaningless pleasantries. When something needs doing in the present they point to their own misfortune. You can recognize a fake friend who’s all talk on these four grounds.

You can recognize a fake friend who’s a flatterer on four grounds. They support you equally in doing bad and doing good. They praise you to your face, and put you down behind your back. You can recognize a fake friend who’s a flatterer on these four grounds.

You can recognize a fake friend who’s a spender on four grounds. They accompany you when drinking, roaming the streets at night, frequenting festivals, and gambling. You can recognize a fake friend who’s a spender on these four grounds.”

That is what the Buddha said. Then the Holy One, the Teacher, went on to say:

“One friend is all take,
another all talk;
one’s just a flatterer,
and one’s a friend who spends.

An astute person understands
these four enemies for what they are
and keeps them at a distance,
as they’d shun a risky road.”



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